Stinky the Skunk

I am a skunk named Stinky and I would make a great pet! I'm house broken, I won't bark when a stranger comes to the door; I don't have stinky breath, and I will protect you with all that I have. Did you know that it is very stuffy in this glass cage on the outside of the pet shop? Pleeeeeaaaase buy me!!!! Don't listen to them! I wouldn't stink up your house, unless I don't get my food on time, if you step on my tail, or if I am trying to protect my toy bunny. You only have to cut my hair twice a day! I'm very young, and have no chance of dying anytime soon. No, I don't smoke, and I love children. In my earlier days I was a nurse. Oh, so you won't buy me? O.K., then asked for it! You won't like what I'm about to do! I'm going to lock you up in my cage and set off stink bombs 24/7!!! Bye, I hope you make the right decision in favor of this small, poor, sincere, honest, and loving homeless pet.