I came out of that movie with words practically dangling from my fingers.
I've always been told I can do whatever I can dream up, and for the most part, I haven't needed much convincing.
But maybe I need to do some more dreaming, because lately, I've felt the boxes closing in on me.
I can do whatever I dream, but what can I do if I'm not dreaming? If I refuse to even shut my eyes for a moment, imagine the universe?
I want to dream.
I want to hang my hopes on the stars and believe I can actually follow them up there someday.
I want to love freely - to wear my heart on my sleeve - no, to wear it as my entire coat. Warm and enveloping everyone around me, without the fear that it isn't my jacket to wear. Without letting myself freeze or worrying that someone will take it away. I want to love myself. I want to love, to ignore the faces my mirror makes at me when I try to stand up, and unwind the clock until time does not exist.
I want to find the hidden figures in the sky, those beautiful wandering souls with stories that have been swept under the carpet when they really deserve to be named as constellations and set into orbit. I want to hear their words, because they are a part of who I am, too.
I want to keep discovering this language, the bridge between my heart and the world, until the words bend in my hands like metal heated right up to to the verge of its melting point. I want them to come out like birds flocking to a telephone pole - electric, feathers flying, a strong clear message.
I say I'm a dreamer. I stand in front of the mirror everyday and tell myself I am alive and thus have great giant wings that span the width of all my problems.
I still forget to jump, though. I seem to be forever caught in the hypothetical confidence that I've gotten so good at. I believe in the possibilities. And then I never ask myself to try one of them out.
When I walked out of that movie theatre, I had a rare moment of belief beyond my mundane dreaming.
I believed that I could truly be anything I wanted to be. I believed that I was who I wanted to be.
Do you believe in yourself? What do you dream of? Have you seen Hidden Figures yet?